8

It feels like a big year. 8 years sober, 8 years of healing, 8 years of layers. Peeling back, opening, stretching, coming undone. Years of pain, years of sorrow all lead me to a brighter tomorrow. “This too shall pass” a saying frequently said, most of my life, however - full of dread. Comfortable with pain, in frequent worry, playing the tapes through - a very sad story. Becoming aware, looking for change - desperate to not remain the same. A light ahead, such a long tunnel “how will I get there, it feels so long”, “follow me she said, I’ll guide you out with my song”. Eyes closed, hard to see, it feels like the tunnel is enclosing all around me. “Follow my voice, I won’t steer you wrong - keep listening to my song.” The tunnel still enclosing, I keep walking along. The light coming closer, I focus on the hum of the song.

Still in pain, I start to drown out the stories - following the path, light in sight. Not giving up, fighting with all my might. Experiencing grace, getting comfortable with ease. Slowly my breath starts coming back to me. Trusting myself and trusting in the song, the voice singing to me - was me all along.

Trusting this voice, learning how to trust me. To love myself is to be free. Free of the stories and free of the dark, sending gratitude as it has left its mark. No longer dreading, hopeful and light. Thankful for the moments where life’s hold doesn’t feel so strong, knowing I can always come back to that song. Never leaving me, always waiting for me to come home - back to my breath and into peace - it is where I belong.